Temper Tantrum Birthday Edition The Utter Fuckery of Ehlers Danlos
So I had a birthday. You know the big one if you are a Douglas Adams fan. I know I am suppose to be “inspiring”. Talk about how life takes different turn and I am so much better for the trials and tribulations of life. Stronger and more creative. All the better for the utter fuckery of everything my body has thrown at me.
Maybe next time.
Today FUCK THIS FUCK THIS FUCK THIS. This is not what I was promised. Go to school, work hard, have the best time in your 40’s, travel , and as they say in Silicon Valley kill it.
I was even lucky enough to beat ALL of the odds and be a working artist. Not just working but a thriving artist earning and creating everyday. I felt validated and excited almost everyday going to work in a business I built from an idea. I was supposed to coast into retirement like this.
I had the family, great kids (they still are and are a point of extreme joy and worry in my life) I have a husband who I adore and travel.
I have been sick since I could remember but everything was not suppose to go to hell at once. I was suppose to adapt and stay in the world. Show everyone hope a disabled woman in a wheelchair could still say it with me....kill it.
I am back in bed having a pity party. We are trying to figure out if I fractured, broke, or dislocated my foot. Yes, that’s a question. Was I waltzing with elephants? BASE jumping? Nope just stepped. Tried walking. Crazy right? This is on top of my dislocated wrist, shoulder, and rib.
A minor temper tantrum. Since life on social media is perfect I just want to say I am PISSED! Yes politics always but right now I am in the body of a 90 year old who lived like Hunter Thompson from brith. The things I wanted to accomplish did not work out. Not looking for pets behind the ear just a general if you are feeling like this you are not even close to alone.
So this is my temper tantrum. If you needed a symbiosis of pissed off at the fuckery of chronic illness and pain I’ve got your back. I’ll give you a hand trust me it hurts so much I will happily give it over.